I have never before realized how much six and seven year olds can deliberately misbehave. It was very frustrating to remind a student that they are not to talk in the hallway, and then in under half of a second they are talking away. I asked a first grader if he was supposed to be talking in the hallway, he said no, but in the same breathe continued to talk. Really??? Talking to first grader who is blatantly ignoring me, makes me want to ignore them! The students at Alexander are not bad kids, but somewhere along the way, I think they missed the whole idea of listening and paying attention.
So, this is where freak out mode begins. Holy junk, these kids have the potential to eat me alive next week. They are crazy, they are everywhere, they scream, they hit, they kick, they run away, they are tattle tales, they whine, they fall down and cry, and I have to keep them occupied for 45 minutes. I am like the little engine that could… I think I can … I think I can… I think I can. I could complain for hours about how the classroom teachers need to stop being push-overs and gain some control, but then I think so the girls who knew me for 30 minutes and already wanted to hold my hand and they walked back into the building. The enjoyment of the engagement with students somehow totally outweighs everything terrible that I think about them. I would rather go teach everyday for the next two years than go to class for a single day. I am just going to have to suck it up and realize that when working with kids, everything is not going to be perfect. That will eat away at me until my perfectionist self can cope, but that is how it has to be.
I would just like to say that I am jealous. I want to work at a school that has enough money for me to put in an outdoor fitness trail with workout equipment. Seeing those kids “workout” was just so exciting to me. The kids seemed to be having a blast and did not want to go in when class was over. Yes! There is hope for the future of these children to be lifetime movers. I have a thousand things running through my head trying to figure out what to do with these kids next week. I pray to the good Lord that things do not get too out of control, and I can keep the students on task. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.
…I think I can… I think I can… I think I can…
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Saturday, April 19, 2008
The Fat, A Brat, and an Angel
No butterflies today! That is because I did not have to teach a class, but just help out. I started out the day helping with pre-school at the Plains elementary. I pretty much felt like a babysitter playing with the students. Basically having a one on one lesson with the student was really neat. It was fun to watch my pre-school student slowly warm up to me and begin to trust me. These four year old kids were cracking us up. Some of the things they said or did, it was so hard not to giggle or laugh. I liked seeing their little brains working and them trying so hard. I was impressed by my student’s ability to skip, gallop and smoothly move in general. He had this long, blonde, curly hair that would bounce when he moved, it was so cute. We worked together well, until I tied his shoes for him. He got pretty mad when he realized that I had double knotted them. After the next activity I un-double knotted them, and he was happy again. He was well behaved until the very end of the class. He was mad that he did not get to walk behind Jackson down the hallway to the Library. Also, when he was getting a drink it was hard for me to get him to stop and let the rest of the line have a turn. Finally, I squatted down and said, “Spiderman has enough water, he does not need to drink anymore” and Andrew stopped drinking and lined up on the wall.
The afternoon was spent with second graders at the Plains. Even though the first class was not the best listeners, they were not too bad to handle. The last class of the day almost made me want to cry. These kids were crazy. They wanted nothing to do with us and had zero respect for what we said. There were two boys who would not stop talking while Mike was trying to teach. After countless times of glaring at them and getting them to listen, I found myself standing directly between them, so when they turned to chat, they just got a nice view of my shins. I felt like a jerk, but this tactic worked and I liked it. Not too long after, Mike instructed the students to find a partner. After the students matched themselves up, there were two girls left over. The one girl was over weight and did not have much confidence in her abilities, the other I had already noticed that she thought she was the queen of the world. I was standing by the overweight student and walked with her over to find her partner. As we were walking across the gym she told me this was not a good idea. As we approached her partner the snotty girl said, “I can not work with that” with the meanest look in her eye. I was blown away. This girl is in second grade! I was about to tell the brat that the overweight girl could throw and catch just as well as she could. Mid sentence another girl cut me off and said that those two girls don’t get along. The way she said it lead me to believe that in the classroom, they try to keep them separated. I turned to the girl that gave me this information and asked her if she would be partners with the heavy weight girl, and she did with out flinching. It all worked out in a matter of 20 seconds, but I could not believe what had just happened. When I looked at the heavyweight girl after the brat called her “that”, I saw the look on her face and knew she had just been crushed on the inside. I thank God for the nice little girl who did not hesitate to be the heavy girl’s partner. I am in this profession to help students like the heavy girl, I am glad I found her a partner that would keep her moving and involved in the activity, because if she would have gone and sat out, my job becomes pointless.
It is only week three of methods, and I have grown as a teacher and a person more than I could have imagined in such a short amount of time.
The afternoon was spent with second graders at the Plains. Even though the first class was not the best listeners, they were not too bad to handle. The last class of the day almost made me want to cry. These kids were crazy. They wanted nothing to do with us and had zero respect for what we said. There were two boys who would not stop talking while Mike was trying to teach. After countless times of glaring at them and getting them to listen, I found myself standing directly between them, so when they turned to chat, they just got a nice view of my shins. I felt like a jerk, but this tactic worked and I liked it. Not too long after, Mike instructed the students to find a partner. After the students matched themselves up, there were two girls left over. The one girl was over weight and did not have much confidence in her abilities, the other I had already noticed that she thought she was the queen of the world. I was standing by the overweight student and walked with her over to find her partner. As we were walking across the gym she told me this was not a good idea. As we approached her partner the snotty girl said, “I can not work with that” with the meanest look in her eye. I was blown away. This girl is in second grade! I was about to tell the brat that the overweight girl could throw and catch just as well as she could. Mid sentence another girl cut me off and said that those two girls don’t get along. The way she said it lead me to believe that in the classroom, they try to keep them separated. I turned to the girl that gave me this information and asked her if she would be partners with the heavy weight girl, and she did with out flinching. It all worked out in a matter of 20 seconds, but I could not believe what had just happened. When I looked at the heavyweight girl after the brat called her “that”, I saw the look on her face and knew she had just been crushed on the inside. I thank God for the nice little girl who did not hesitate to be the heavy girl’s partner. I am in this profession to help students like the heavy girl, I am glad I found her a partner that would keep her moving and involved in the activity, because if she would have gone and sat out, my job becomes pointless.
It is only week three of methods, and I have grown as a teacher and a person more than I could have imagined in such a short amount of time.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Real Lessons and Real Students 4-11-08
“Huge improvement from last week!” That is what Mr. Snider wrote on the back of my evaluation. That comment defiantly put a smile on my face. I had once again gotten myself worked up and nervous about teaching. I was much more confident this time, however the thought of my cooperating teacher thinking my lesson was lame was eating at me. It was my first time teaching a real lesson to real students, and I didn’t want to mess up.
I liked my lesson and was excited about teaching it. Awaiting my turn, I was not as nervous as last week. When it was my turn, the nerves left and I was ready to teach this lesson. The lesson went smoothly and the students seemed to be enjoying the activity I had planned. I made a dice box to use for the activity. I only wanted to number it 1-4, and a rectangular box inconviently has 6 sides. I ended up just making the two ends black and numbering the larger surfaces. I practiced the night before rolling the box so that it only landed on a numbered surface, after about 15 attempts of successful rolling I was confident that it would be just fine to use in class. During the lesson I rolled the dice about 5 or 6 times. On the last time, the box landed on the black, un-numbered surface. Great, what am I supposed to do now? I picked up the dice and told the students that I would roll it again. Well, much to my surprise the dice landed on the black surface again. I then told the class if it landed on black one more time, then everybody would get to give a huge cheer. Not attempting to roll a black, I did. The kids loved it! Something I dreaded happened, and it turned out for the best. The rest of the lesson went just fine, and I could finally breathe again.
I felt pretty good with my class. But now, it was time to find out what Mr. Snider thought about it. Thankfully, he said it was great and that I made a huge improvement from the previous week. The other comment he made was that I have a unique voice, and I use it well. He said that I have a voice we don’t hear everyday, and that is a good thing. Unique voice? The only thing I could think of was that I have an annoying voice and the students pay attention just so they don’t have to hear me repeat myself. Hopefully, that is not the case. Once again I am probably just freaking out for no reason. I am just going to tell myself that Mr. Snider wouldn’t lie, so if he said it was good, then it was good.
In the afternoon I taught the same class of first graders that I taught last week. This week went much better. I did much better waiting on them to shut up and listen to me. Last week, it was so hard to just wait. I wanted to just hurry up, give directions, and get the students moving as fast as I possibly could. I felt uncomfortable that they were not all being quiet and sitting still, so I just talked over them and got things moving. Today I was completely content with standing there looking at them until they were ready to listen.
I am excited about my next teaching assignment and my passion is continuing to grow.
I liked my lesson and was excited about teaching it. Awaiting my turn, I was not as nervous as last week. When it was my turn, the nerves left and I was ready to teach this lesson. The lesson went smoothly and the students seemed to be enjoying the activity I had planned. I made a dice box to use for the activity. I only wanted to number it 1-4, and a rectangular box inconviently has 6 sides. I ended up just making the two ends black and numbering the larger surfaces. I practiced the night before rolling the box so that it only landed on a numbered surface, after about 15 attempts of successful rolling I was confident that it would be just fine to use in class. During the lesson I rolled the dice about 5 or 6 times. On the last time, the box landed on the black, un-numbered surface. Great, what am I supposed to do now? I picked up the dice and told the students that I would roll it again. Well, much to my surprise the dice landed on the black surface again. I then told the class if it landed on black one more time, then everybody would get to give a huge cheer. Not attempting to roll a black, I did. The kids loved it! Something I dreaded happened, and it turned out for the best. The rest of the lesson went just fine, and I could finally breathe again.
I felt pretty good with my class. But now, it was time to find out what Mr. Snider thought about it. Thankfully, he said it was great and that I made a huge improvement from the previous week. The other comment he made was that I have a unique voice, and I use it well. He said that I have a voice we don’t hear everyday, and that is a good thing. Unique voice? The only thing I could think of was that I have an annoying voice and the students pay attention just so they don’t have to hear me repeat myself. Hopefully, that is not the case. Once again I am probably just freaking out for no reason. I am just going to tell myself that Mr. Snider wouldn’t lie, so if he said it was good, then it was good.
In the afternoon I taught the same class of first graders that I taught last week. This week went much better. I did much better waiting on them to shut up and listen to me. Last week, it was so hard to just wait. I wanted to just hurry up, give directions, and get the students moving as fast as I possibly could. I felt uncomfortable that they were not all being quiet and sitting still, so I just talked over them and got things moving. Today I was completely content with standing there looking at them until they were ready to listen.
I am excited about my next teaching assignment and my passion is continuing to grow.
First Day Jitters - 4/4/08
Today ended up being a great day, however, I am completely exhausted. I started out the day with butterflies in my stomach. The butterflies actually started last night before I went to bed, and prevented me from falling asleep for quite some time. Observing 6 classes in the morning calmed my nerves, convincing myself that maybe I could actually pull this off. Then as I drove from Pleasantville to Bremen, the butterflies came back in full force. I knew that once I started teaching everything would be fine and I would be having fun, but that did not stop the feeling in my gut.
Finally, it was my turn to teach. I survived. Everything started out really smoothly, and seeing the kid’s smiling faces really calmed my nerves. They had no idea they were the first real students I ever taught. Good thing! As I transitioned into an activity, I realized I had the biggest class of the day, and there were not enough foam pins for each of the students. Earlier in the day I was told that it is okay to mess up, and have to stop and start over. I am glad I heard that advice, because I might have freaked out otherwise. I just told the students to freeze and we moved onto the next activity. Things went okay for the most part, and I was proud of myself for keeping my composure. The kids seemed to be having lots of fun, and I was as well.
Fall quarter I taught a lesson in PESS205, and confirmed to myself that I had chosen the correct major. After today, there is no doubt in my mind. This is what I want to do, and my passion for it is growing each day.
Even though I am happy that today went smoothly, I am glad it is over. I know the butterflies probably are not over with; however the first day jitters are hopefully gone. Now, I just need to practice, practice, and practice.
Finally, it was my turn to teach. I survived. Everything started out really smoothly, and seeing the kid’s smiling faces really calmed my nerves. They had no idea they were the first real students I ever taught. Good thing! As I transitioned into an activity, I realized I had the biggest class of the day, and there were not enough foam pins for each of the students. Earlier in the day I was told that it is okay to mess up, and have to stop and start over. I am glad I heard that advice, because I might have freaked out otherwise. I just told the students to freeze and we moved onto the next activity. Things went okay for the most part, and I was proud of myself for keeping my composure. The kids seemed to be having lots of fun, and I was as well.
Fall quarter I taught a lesson in PESS205, and confirmed to myself that I had chosen the correct major. After today, there is no doubt in my mind. This is what I want to do, and my passion for it is growing each day.
Even though I am happy that today went smoothly, I am glad it is over. I know the butterflies probably are not over with; however the first day jitters are hopefully gone. Now, I just need to practice, practice, and practice.
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